Television Sex

1. Well all I did today was work so that’s all you get. And perhaps a different style off the cuff, a different rhythm, yes.

Today we listened to parents and kids 10-12 talking about tv. Tv and sex, really. TV is a presenter of sexual information. The parents were worried, the kids embarrassed, perhaps picking up on their parents emotional cues. Shows like Friends, The OC, Smallville.

There was much to be learned here. First, most 10-12 year olds do not instinctively try to break rules. That’s a few years ahead still. They are not interested much in sex, or the opposite sex. The hormones have not kicked in. For some reasons parents don’t want their kids to know that much about sex. Knowing perhaps deeply linked with doing.

The kids were played clips. Asked what they thought was going on. The 12 year olds understood adult situations, not from the sex standpoint, but more from an interactive standpoint. What the circumstances were. What the relationships were. Timeframe/history sometimes. The 10 year olds were only at reading the reactions of the characters – when X was not understood, what was the emotional reaction of the other person? A clear indication of graduated awareness of social complexity. And a brilliant use – rarely seen by me – of asking “What do you see?”. Critical. What is said, what is omitted, even physiological reactions – these open a window to the workings of a child’s mind. Here made clear by two different age groups. Again, the main difference, the older kids were able to construct or realize the social situations of the characters.

What was not answered was why sex was on TV, at 8pm, when kids were watching. Yes, ratings, yes, easy to construct humor, yes, adult audiences, yes, sex is interesting, yes parents need to monitor, yes, upset at sex on TV a bit – but it was never stated, nor directly asked, nor even hinted at: sex is a fundamental part of our lives. To remove sex, or a sexual element from even the most mundane events much less those events that for millennium have been the staples of drama – chronicled at least from Greek periods on up – to remove sex leaves only the artifice of the 50’s – a period now deemed absurd. Sex is a huge part of life. Let’s admit it, portray it in all it’s facets, and go on. If there is one lesson learned today, it’s that when kids aren’t interested in sex, they really aren’t.

2. Of course, now all I want to do is grab a girl and spend a week watching The OC, Friends, That 70's Show and making love at every possible moment.

3. I remember seeing Dawson's Creek for the first time and I thought, Wow, powerful stuff. Can I live this please?