Well, what lengths one must go to, just to rile people. But you know it's all true.
Why would I spend time and considerable energy going on about my faults? No one cares but me. Your faults, whoever you are in this nameless placeless god-forsaken dump -- your faults are comedy. Should I go on that some people think I am irrythmic on the piano (or really, irrythmic in general?) No. If I was getting laid, I would talk about it. If stand-up tonight had worked, if the entire crowd of 23 year old filipinos had given me their wallets (since I came on as NYPD and said GIVE ME ALL YOUR WALLETS but only got like 6), if if if if if if if
whatever, go steal your mom's identity, you know her maiden name for christ sake
and remember - I only do Safe Comedy. Imagine what I really could be saying . . .
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